Don't Say A Word
by fireandflood
Summary: Kirk threw back a shot to forget his pointed ears. He threw back another one to forget that perfect jaw line. Another one for those perfect eyes; but no matter how much he drank, he could forget his feelings.


**Disclaimer: **No matter how much I wish I own Star Trek, because then I would be rich and have some pretty seriously awesome bragging rights, alas I do not. That's upsetting isn't it? :(

**Author's Note:** Hey guys. Just to let you know, because I know some readers from my other story really don't like slash, this story does have so slash in it. So I apologize to those readers, I'll post something else for you guys soon though! Everyone else...I hope you enjoy this!

Don't Say A Word

Kirk almost fell off his barstool as he threw back another shot. The alcohol burned his throat as it went down. His thoughts were beginning to become fuzzy, his vision was becoming hazy, and his coordination was practically non-existent. Yet the alcohol did nothing to numb the hole gnawing away at his gut. He'd been battling this feeling of emptiness ever since they'd arrive on this godforsaken planet. He tried to remember the name of the planet but drew a blank. Kirk tried to remind himself that it was not his fault that the Enterprise was in for some quite serious repair work. He couldn't have controlled a Klignon Warbird appearing out of nowhere and turning its weapons on them. They would have all been dead if it hadn't been for some quick thinking by his first officer and some amazing flying by his helmsman. Kirk tried to stop himself but it was too late. His mind rushed through the memory of the sudden attack. Some of it was a little fuzzy due to the alcohol, but it was mostly still in tact.

They had been on their way to some planet Kirk couldn't remember the name of, actually come to think of it the planet they had been heading to might be the planet they were on right now, for shore leave. Suddenly he was informed that the radar was picking up another ship. They had only seconds before they found out firsthand that the ship was Klignon. The Warbird dropped out of warp right in front of them. They began firing on the Enterprise before anyone had really realized what was going on. The ship rocketed with an explosion as they were hit. The weapons were powerful; the shields couldn't hold them back for long. Kirk barked out instructions to his helmsman, Sulu, but nothing worked. They couldn't escape the fire of the Warbird. They were facing certain death when his first officer suddenly spoke up. He instructed Sulu to perform a very difficult flying maneuver. Sulu's eyes widened in fear a little as he heard his instructions, he looked to Kirk for confirmation. Kirk froze for a second. On one hand, Sulu could do this and they might be able to escape if he succeeded; but if he failed, they would die, there was no doubt about it. But then again, they faced certain death anyway if they didn't do this. Kirk nodded, indicating he agreed with his first officer. Sulu swallowed audibly as he turned back to the controls. Kirk knew that this maneuver was extremely difficult and normally he would never even think about doing it, but this wasn't normal circumstances, this was a life or death situation.

It was a tense few minutes; Kirk had never been so stressed in his life. Nevertheless, they pulled through. Sulu somehow managed to pull off that incredible piece of flying. He deserved some sort of award; they would all be dead if it hadn't been for him. Kirk was sitting in his captain's chair, he had sent most people to go and rest. Only a few people remained, just enough to get by. They were en route to a planet that would be able to help them repair the Enterprise. Kirk felt a pang of guilt as he thought about the damage to his ship. He vowed that he would never let anything like this happen to her again. He closed his eyes for a moment; he was exhausted both mentally and physically. He could barely stay awake but he had to, he was needed. He was drifting off slightly when someone tapped on his shoulder.

"Captain, you should return to your quarters. You are of no help when suffering from exhaustion." Kirk turned around and found himself face to face with his first officer.

"I'm fine." Kirk insisted.

"It is quite clear that you are not, Captain. Please rest, I will oversee everything while you are not here." He explained.

"You need to rest too." Kirk pointed out.

"I assure you, I am more than capable of getting by without collapsing with exhaustion, something you appear to be on the verge of doing." He noted.

Kirk nodded and trudged down the corridor leading to his cabin, the weight of the events of the day on his shoulders.

Kirk's heart stammered slightly as he thought about his second in command. He tried to stop himself before his mind ran away on him, but it was too late. He could see the Vulcan in his mind's eye. Kirk had been practically avoiding him for the past few weeks. Every little thing about him scared Kirk, everything down to arc between his strongly sculptured jaw and perfectly pointed ears. Kirk wasn't used to feeling intimidated by someone, let alone his feelings for someone.

_No_

Kirk slammed back enough shot. He refused to let himself believe that he had stronger feelings than lust for someone he worked with. Not only was this unprofessional and immature, it was wrong. His first officer was going through a bad break up and everyone knew he was torn up about, even though he claimed 'not to feel emotion'.

_ Yeah right, no one ever bought that bullshit_.

Kirk nodded towards the bartender, indicating that he wanted another. He was reaching towards the glass when he felt a hand on his shoulder. Kirk turned, his fist clenched, primed for a bar fight.

"I think you've consumed enough alcohol for the evening, Captain." Kirk's eyes were drawn to the tips of the speaker's ears.

"Maybe, maybe not…What's it to you huh?" Kirk slurred drunkenly. He could usually hold his liquor, his must have drunken a lot more than he realized.

"It is part of my job to look out for you safety. As captain it would be unwise for you to be left wandering an unfamiliar planet alone." The speaker raised his eyebrow skeptically as he watched Kirk sway drunkenly on the barstool.

"Hate to break it to you…but I'm not your captain anymore. At least not while she's being repaired."

"You're are not to blame for the ships damages." The speaker stated intently.

"That's beside the point." He waved his hand in the air, dismissing the idea. "The point is that _you_," He pointed haphazardly at the Vulcan. "don't need to look out for me while she's in for repairs."

"Whether or not you are my captain, I still wish to look out for you, Jim" He spoke quietly.

Someone in Kirk's mind, which was smothered with alcohol induced fog, he recognized the tone of voice that his first officer was using. It was identical to the soft tone he had taken to using whenever he spoke to the Vulcan in the past few weeks. The tone that betrayed his evident want for his first officer. His second in command grabbed Kirk by the arm and hoisted him off of the barstool. Kirk knew the Vulcan was strong, he had experienced that first hand after a very one-sided fight that resulted in a heavily bleeding nose on Kirk's part, but he hadn't been expecting to be pulled out of his seat. He was now swaying dangerously, threatening to fall over. He felt a hand grab his elbow, steadying him and guiding him gently out of the bar.

Kirk made a split second decision, knowing it was now or never. A decision that he never would have made had he been in his right mind; however, the alcohol in his system made him fearless. The moment the exited the bar, Kirk pushed his first officer up against the wall. Their bodies were tangled together in a perfect fit. He knew that his first officer could easily overpower him if he wanted to push him away; but judging by the look in his eyes, that was the last thing he wanted to do.

"This is not a sensible course of action, Jim." The Vulcan said as Kirk's lips moved slowly over his neck.

"Since when am I ever sensible?" Kirk murmured gently into his shoulder.

"Jim…" Kirk silenced him with a passionate kiss. "This is needs to stop." But the Vulcan made no move to stop Kirk.

"Why? I want this, you want this? So why not?" Kirk questioned. He placed his hands against the wall on either side of his first officer's head, pinning him there. He leaned in so his forehead was touching the Vulcan's. A pair of blue eyes stared into a pair of brown eyes, both reflecting the same smoldering look. They were completely different, yet perfect for each other.

"It is not enough to simply want something, Jim." The Vulcan began to pull away, but Kirk stopped him.

"What if it's not just want? What if it's a need?" Kirk asked, the intensity in his eyes growing with every second that passed. His first officer stilled, his eyes reflecting the same need and want as Kirk's. He opened his mouth to speak again, but Kirk cut him off. "Don't say a word."

He connected his lips with the Vulcan's, slipping his hands through his first officers black locks and tangling them there. He pulled back slightly, taking another look into the Vulcan's fiery brown eyes, before closing his eyes and letting out a sigh of contentment.

"Spock."

**Author's Note: **So you know what makes me really happy? Reviews....and guess what?! They're really easy too! All you have to do is click that little button and type something and click that other little button that says submit. Isn't that easy?! It would honestly make my day if you guys would do that :) Also, I got the title from the song Don't Say A Word by David Cook (Who is awesome and that song is awesome) but the song is in no way related to the story, it's about something completely different. I hope you enjoyed it!


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